It's been a long time coming

But you know change is going to come. I've been through a lot in the past couple of months and especially these last couple of weeks. I feel my heart breaking it seems every day. It seems I'm back to that feeling where you want someone so bad but sadly they don't want you. All you can think of is why? Then you try and make yourself feel better by saying oh it will pass in time, he'll come back to me, he loves me, he can never let me go. But then it really starts to sink in. What if it is really over and there is no going back? There is no way to show how much you have changed and grown as a person? They don't want you and you know it but there is just something that won't let you let it go. You know it's different in every fiber of your being. From the way he never says I love you, well, he does but only after you have said it. He hesitates and those moments when he looks into your eyes and you know he wants to say I love you but something holds him back. Those moments hurt the most, knowing that you can and want to say i love you but you won't. Change is good I know but not at the expense of being this hurt or feeling this alone. I'm happy by myself without a doubt, that is never a question but when you feel a person makes your day that much brighter and better is when you know you need them more than want. I know all these feelings will pass and I will be okay. Maybe we'll make it, maybe we won't but either way I'm yours forever. Maybe not either way. I want you all of you not just part if I can't have that then maybe we are better off just being apart.